DESTINATIONS - BUSH CHARACTERS, YARNS & POETRY
It’s not widely known that when Bill Gates was developing computer terminology he relied heavily on old Aussie bush lore, but here’s solid proof.
Log on – make the campfire hotter
Log Off – the fire is too hot
Monitor – watching the fire
Download – get the firewood off the 4WD
Hard drive – trip back home without any cold tinnies
Keyboard – where you hang the 4WD and bike keys
Windows – what you shut when it’s cold
Crash – what you’d like to avoid
No connection – tow rope broke
Wireless – busted winch cable
Screen – what you shut in the mosquito season
Blue screen – what you see at the top of a dune
Byte – what mosquitoes do
Bit – what mosquitoes did
Mega Byte – what Cape York mosquitoes do
Chips – what you eat with beer
Micro Chips – what’s left on your face after you’ve eaten the chips
Modem – what you did to the weeds
Laptop – where the cat sleeps
Software – plastic knives and forks you get at roadhouses
Hardware – steel knives and forks
Mouse – what eats the grain in the shed
Mouse mat – the mat the mouse ate
Mainframe – what holds the shed up
Web – what spiders make
Web site – spiders’ haunts
Cursor – bogged off-roader
Search engine – what you do when the 4WD won’t go
Yahoo – what you say when the 4WD does go
Upgrade – a steep hill
Server – the person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch
Mail server – the bloke at the pub that brings out the counter lunch
Users – 4WD owners who keep borrowing things
Network – when you have to repair your fishing net
Internet – cross-woven fish net repair method
Netscape – when a fish manoeuvres out of reach of the net
On line – when the washing’s hung out
Off line – when the washing falls in the dirt
Got any more?